Bear's Life and Tides

Thursday September 24, 2020 Alas, this is the last entry of this blog. Bear's life will go on. The tides will continue to ebb and flow. I needed a break. I feel like I lost my mojo. Maybe I am depressed over the pandemic and what feels like the worst year of my life/our lives. I feel like I my life is on hold. Something is holding me back from everything. I feel unmotivated. Unexcited. I am just going through the motions every day; even with the blog.  I read through a bunch of my old blog entries. There were days when words poured out of me. I am pulling them out of me right now. Hard to be joyful about anything.  I'll start up again when the spirit moves me.  the bear

Tuesday September 22, 2020 Beth and I spent last night in SF. We had dinner with Mark and Helen. As always, the wines and food were superb. We started off with a bottle of champagne and appetizers (including some of my smoked albacore). Helen made a vegan Caesar salad with tahini and nutritional yeast. Sounds weird - tasted delicious. Main course was shish kabob with tender steak from Bryan's Market. We washed it down with a single vineyard Chianti Classico.  For dessert, we drank sauterne.  Lovely hosts. We had the obligatory political discussion and prayer for change. We had a nice walk along the   Embarcadero this morning. Visited my mom in the afternoon. She looks GREAT! Fishing tomorrow. the bear

  Sunday September 20, 2020 Beth and I drove north to Sea Ranch to visit Chuck and Deborah yesterday. We stayed overnight. We returned to Inverness today. It was a beautiful drive up the coast. About two and a half hours. Chuck and Deborah live in San Anselmo. Sea Ranch was their second home - til the pandemic. We met Chuck in 1992, in Palau, where we both worked as attorneys for the Palauan Government. Chuck worked for the Supreme Court; I was the Senate Legal Counsel. I'll talk about our year in Palau another time. Chuck and Deborah moved up to Sea Ranch in February. They have been their since. They are likely to sell their home in San Anselmo and live in Sea Ranch permanently. Chuck just rented an office there. Let's talk about Chuck. My age. From the midwest originally. His family ran a restaurant, famous for their broasted chicken. I have spent enough time with Chuck that I know many unimportant facts about his life. Chuck overcame many hardships in his life to ...

Friday September 18, 2020 Beth and I hiked at Abbotts Lagoon yesterday morning. It was a misty morning. Not too cold. Hardly anybody there. The mist made the spider webs visible. We got a fabulous bird show. First, a blue heron on the bridge. He squawked angrily and flew off, as we crossed. Across the bridge, there were large flocks of huge brown pelicans. More pelicans on the beach, surrounded by scavenger seagulls. We enjoyed our walk. We sat on a log and meditated by the ocean. I appreciate the free time we have. We are lucky to have escaped the rat race. I was supposed to go salmon fishing this morning. I canceled because I felt so wiped out yesterday. I overdid it on Wednesday: bike ride; hike and tree trimming. I napped for two hours yesterday. I felt fine today. I missed going fishing. The crew went without me - and got skunked.  Thomas came over for a walk and candle light outdoor dinner today. We did our local "First Valley" loop hike. Then, more albacore.  ...

Wednesday September 16, 2020 The air is much better today. One less thing to worry about. We did nada yesterday. Just stayed inside pretty much. I took advantage of the clear air today and took a 43 mile bike ride. As I left, it was foggy but not too cold. Sometimes, I play a song in my head while I ride. Today, it was Suzanne by Leonard Cohen. It felt so good to get some exercise. My last ride was August 18th - almost a month ago. I did the exact same ride a tenth of mile per hour faster. Despite being out of shape, I still rode hard today. I did a one minute meditation before the hardest climb. I don't know what possessed me to do that. At the top of the climb, Greg called me to talk about fishing. We talk about fishing almost every day. He is obsessed like me. We both read all the reports, look at the weather and look for opportunities to fish. I had been kind of depressed before my ride. I had feelings of inadequacy and lack of purpose. I was supposed ...

  Monday September 14, 2020 I am a day late again. Sue me. I am discouraged. We were just getting over the fire in Pt. Reyes when fires popped up all over the west coast. The smoke is horrible. You can hardly go outside. For me, it is like the straw that broke the camel's back. I am going stir crazy. I want to ride my bicycle. I have had no exercise for about a month. I am still getting over the last fishing trip. Too much work. After we got home, I had to spend a day getting the boat back in the water and returning the trailer to the yard where it lives. I am going to sell the trailer. I have only used it once in two years. It was such a gigantic hassle to get a truck, the trailer and boat all in one place; only to have to put everything back again after returning. Never again. It was a great fishing trip but I am still tired three days later. Beth and I dropped off Robert's truck tonight, ending the last task. We had dinner with him. Robert cannot sit idle. He is putting in ...

  Friday September 11, 2020 Earl, Greg and I towed the boat up to Ft. Bragg yesterday (about 4 hours). We spent the night at a motel. Earl barbecued steaks and veggies for dinner.  We washed it down with red wine. Greg and I studied the fishing reports and strategized our fishing adventure. I was in bed by 9:30. Up at 5 a.m., we launched the boat about 6:30 in the dark. We navigated our way up the river and got into the ocean about daybreak.  The ocean was incredibly calm. Greg picked a great day to go out. We had to go far to reach the warm water which held the albacore we were after. The water was about 56 degrees near the harbor. We wanted water over 60 degrees. We went out about 50 miles. Not a typo - fifty miles. The water was a deep deep blue.  We began trolling at about 8 a.m. At about 11:30 a.m., after reaching a location that someone said was promising, I noticed a big patch of floating kelp/seaweed.  I made a u-turn to try to g...

  Wednesday September 9, 2020 We survived labor day weekend. Mark and Karen came over to Inverness for dinner on Monday. I made a vegetarian dinner. I warned them in advance. They snuck in some chicken sausage. I guess the thought of not eating meat scares them. I spent the past two days preparing for a fishing trip. Greg, Earl and I are towing my boat north to Ft. Bragg to fish for Albacore Tuna. Yesterday, I cleaned the boat, picked up Robert's truck and took the boat to the shop to get the electronics fixed. Today, Earl and I drove back and forth from the East Bay to San Rafael, getting the boat out of the water. I'll spare you the details other than it took all day. We discussed what hard work it is to prepare for a big fishing trip. I told him I have a new rule for big fishing trips: go on somebody else's boat! Today was the weirdest day ever. There was so much smoke high up in the atmosphere that the sun could not break thru. The sky...

  Sunday September 6, 2020 We are now back home in San Francisco. Yesterday, Beth and I took one last walk on the beach in La Jolla. We walked around town, had a salad for lunch, packed the car and drove to Los Angeles. HOT DAY! The temperature was well over 100 degrees.  We checked into our hotel and Peg came over to get us. We had Italian takeout for Dinner with Peg, Bill and Cooper. Today after breakfast with Bill and Peg, we had a five hour drive home from LA-SF. The only traffic was on the Bay Bridge. Meyer came over for dinner. My letter to America:  Dear Americans: This includes ALL races, religions, national origins and political affiliations. We need to come together in these difficult times. A nation divided cannot function. We need to love and respect each other. We are one nation. Our nation has faced adversity before. We came together as ONE people to battle common enemies. We must not follow those who hate and divide us. Follow the path w...

  Friday September 4, 2020 About five days ago, I announced to Beth that I was going to San Diego. I needed a vacation badly. I told her I was going whether she joined me or not. She made a wise choice. We drove down yesterday. It was a fast and easy drive. Seven hours. It felt funny to drive by Peg's exit in LA and not stop. We'll see her tomorrow. We are staying in a hotel in La Jolla and loving it. I made a pilgrimage to Pt. Loma Seafood last night for a smoked fish salad. Beth was on her computer zooming a Spanish class. Beth is like a new person. She did not realize how badly she needed to get away. This has been an extremely stressful year. All I wanted to do was get somewhere warm, with clear air and dip my toes in the Pacific. Mission accomplished. I have not checked the air in the Bay Area while we have been away. I could not take it anymore. One reason I picked San Diego was that the air seemed consistently clear of smoke. Our batteries are ...

  I did legal work the last two days. Depositions for my old firm by zoom. I enjoyed it. The first deposition involved an old client of mine. Great to spend time with her.  It felt good to review the files and prepare the clients thoroughly. My preparation is usually harder for the client than the actual deposition.  My mental tools are still sharp. It was exhilarating to use them again. More to come next week.  We had dinner at Thomas' house tonight. We started off with a shot of herring juice to honor my Grandpa Meyer's memory. When I was a kid, he told us a story about pulling the bristles off pigs, selling the bristles to the brush factory and buying herring juice with the money, because they couldn't afford actual herring. After the herring, we had a shot of Tennessee whiskey, chased by a shot of pickle juice. I suppose we could have eaten an actual pickle; but Thomas said this is how they do it in Tennessee. Great dinner. Capr...